DARK VERSE – WINTRYPOET

EMISSARY

I sent the nightingale as an emissary,
To sing the songs I once sang to you.
In her beak, I placed some love verses,
And off to your heart, it excitedly flew.

I kissed that tiny beak and sent her off;
I hope she finds her way to your heart.
I remain here languishing in your absence.
All blear-eyed and my soul ripped apart.

When you greet my messenger, do not fear
Should she approach your heart and despair.
I told her to lean upon your chest and listen
To my unceasing cries still echoing there.

©Habib Dabajeh

SILENT GARDEN

I walked the Silent Garden looking for you;
The hours passed, and it was nearing dawn.
As my mind wandered, a soft wind blew,
And a bird broke my thoughts with a song.

I strolled upon the garden’s hollow ground,
And the bird followed wherever I’d go.
He appeared to be frantically searching around,
As he softly trilled the pangs of woe.

The world to me is now a shrew;
Every day my heart bears another load.
I wake each dawn from dreams of you,
And my heart just wants to implode.

Complaints are baseless, and tears dry up.
My daily thoughts bring deeper despair.
The memories of you swell, and never stop,
And my weakened heart struggles to bear.

I circled that garden and I hoped and prayed,
That my mind could somehow envision you.
I saw only that bird, and how it played,
From bough to bough, and continue to coo.

It finally gave up and left me blear-eyed,
And realized its singing was all in vain.
As my eyes ruptured, I fell by your side,
And watered the dirt that houses my pain.

©Habib Dabajeh

TEARS WON’T STOP

Under the bright populous dome above,
I raise one last hopeless prayer.
Here I stand enslaved by your love,
As I wander this frozen desert of despair.
I offered my heart to you as a token,
And deciphered that language you dreamt of.
Your legacy remains, and can never be broken;
When from my tongue your name is spoken.

On this brisk night, as the piercing wind blows,
The full moon blushed and slowly rose.
It spread its beautiful smile over a frozen field,
But its beauty did not appease my heart’s woe.
I stood there shivering, and I refused to yield,
To the blistering winds and the blowing snow.
My boggled mind was attempting to compose,
All the sadness that my heart quietly concealed.
I wanted to bleed the words of love to show,
How from your beautiful eyes came all the prose;
And the forthcoming tears that you’ll never know.

A slow death would have been kinder for me,
When you walked away and I was dismissed.
My heart was stricken and ceased to exist,
But the sad verses continued incessantly.
Tonight, I was hoping I could somehow start
A few sad lines for you, but my mind froze up.
As poetry fades and vacates my heart,
I hear the crows wail, and watch the moon drop.
I’m alone and cold, and the tears won’t stop.

©Habib Dabajeh

UNDAUNTED

Your love in my heart gave me solace;
Now I’m broken, and despair binds me.
I’m missing the smile that once lit your face,
But here I stand undaunted and fettered free.

Now and then, I think of your smile;
The way you looked with eyes so blue.
Cold darkness fills my heart, yet all the while,
I stand undaunted thinking of you.

Dark clouds gather, and I see no light
To guide me without a hand to hold.
It’s high noon, but it’s my darkest night,
And I walk undaunted as the thunder rolled.

Adding to the misery of pebbles in my shoes,
The freezing rain fell and soaked my cold feet.
My eyes were tempted, but did not diffuse;
As I laugh undaunted at my self-conceit.

A relentless wind suddenly blows in.
The wet leaves begin to scatter everywhere.
As coldness pierces through my shivering skin,
I stood undaunted in the unforgiving air.

To the discomfort of my resounding ears,
The uncanny cries of distant crows
Only induce further my swollen fears,
But I stood undaunted in my darkest throes.

On my way back home with tired feet,
Trenches filled my path wherever I stepped.
A bird called her lover, with a song so sweet,
And I succumbed, and fell to my knees and wept.

©Habib Dabajeh

SLEEPY EYES

Inside this cold cabin, I strike a match,
And light a few scented candles for you.
I toss a few more logs into the fire,
To warm some thoughts and pull me through.

My eyes suddenly grow weary from the smoke;
Both are hypnotized by the ember’s melody.
Overcome with a chill, I’m back in your arms,
And the warmness of your body embracing me.

The moon comes overhead, so full of grace.
The fireflies glow and embellish the night.
As candles burn and flicker off the walls,
I’m bathed by your eyes and your tender light.

Fierce winds begin to whistle and moan,
And on the roof, the gentle rains start.
The sweetest of sounds filled the night,
But it’s your laughter that fills my heart.

The owls begin their nightly opera,
As crickets cry, trying to mimic me.
My heart suspended between hope and despair,
And now my ears are filled with a crow’s eulogy.

To the cold and black embers, I open my eyes,
And to melted candle wax, and a still silence of pain.
I softly cry out for you, but I’m all alone;
So I close my eyes to find you again.

©Habib Dabajeh 9/12

I WISH

I wish I could rewind that magical spring,
As I kissed your lips and made you sigh.
To lie next to you, and hear your heart sing;
I only dream of it now, and it makes me cry.

To bathe your body once more with wine,
Using the soft petals of a summer rose.
To feel that body pressed against mine,
As I verse your beauty with endless prose.

I wish we were lying beneath the starry sky,
Like lovers that gaze without having to speak.
To see once again that sparkle in your eye,
As my lips softly trace your blushing cheek.

There was the wind that played in your hair,
The nightingale that sang for us that night.
The night you were ungarbed dancing on air,
As your body softly quivered in the moonlight.

To lay once more upon your warm breast,
And listen to the laughter of your soul.
If only my heart could find peace and rest,
And let you go, but that’s beyond my control.

I wish you never uttered that lame excuse;
It shattered my spirit and vexed my mind.
I wish your heart never had to choose,
But a choice was made, and I was left behind.

Verses continue to feed my heart love’s pain;
But this is my life now, what more can I do?
Like an endless longing, dismal and in vain,
I bleed this poetry that all sprang from you.

©Habib Dabajeh 4/97

HEART NECKLACE

I made a necklace to adorn your heart,
And used beads from all the worlds.
Ending it was the hardest part,
Because your beauty required endless pearls.

To the fullest extent of my mind,
I poured out both my heart and tongue.
I hope you treasure what I have designed,
This pearly necklace with tears strung.

©Habib Dabajeh 3/5/01

WAILING HEART

As birds rise to greet the day,
From dreams of you, I rise to hear
Their sweet songs fill my ear,
And their voice is ever pleasing.
Not knowing my pain, to me they pray
With songs of rapture never ceasing.

What can they know, but song and cheer?
How can they ever come to realize
This sad heart that bathed in your eyes?
They rise unburdened, joyous and free.
I rise and weep consumed by fear,
Pleading for what was, and never more shall be!

III

As the sun sets, the moon finds me
Where nature demands the heart to incite.
As stars circle the queen of the night,
She proudly upholds her throne of fame.
A nightingale perched in a nearby tree
Sighs deeply, as it calls out your name;

I weep, knowing it will call all night in vain.
An owl grins down at me and shouts,
Asking for news of your whereabouts.
Oh, Love! All nature was in disarray!
Even the crickets sang out in pain
Asking for you, but what was I to say?

I came here to clear my thoughts of you.
With a wailing heart, I sought to find
The bliss of nature for the tormented mind.
And what I saw were roses so fair,
Dancing and smiling on fields of dew,
But it was your face I pictured there!

And tears from my eyes did start,
As the wind engaged bushes and trees,
And I heard your laughter in the breeze.
I then marveled at how the sea,
Calls each wave back into her heart,
And I wept, wishing you would call out to me.

VII

But for Your beauty, what did I know?
So lost am I from myself now,
That I sit beneath our favorite bough,
Overlooking that same garden fair,
Where we sowed our hopes for love to grow.
But, alas! I can only imagine you there!

VIII

In Your heart, I was bathed in pure light,
But now, like a moth, I call out your name
From hell’s darkness seeking your flame.
Oh, Love, who is as hopeless as I?
Like a candle, I weep for you all night,
And come the dawn, I melt and die.

©Habib Dabajeh 5/88

OH, BLESSED DREAMS!

I watched the soft wind enchanting a tree,
And I learned how to carefully undress you.
I observed how the moonbeams kiss the sea,
And my lips now yearn to kiss and caress you.

I hear sweet song birds welcoming the dawn,
And just as your eyes open, I’m singing to you.
The sun rises, and the moon and stars have gone
Back home into your eyes, and I’m clinging to you.

O blessed dreams! How bittersweet this deception.
In my creative mind, how I secretly conceal you!
Whenever my heart aches and I have no perception,
I lay on my pillow to close my eyes and reveal you.

©Habib Dabajeh 12/20

DO YOU REMEMBER?

You remember blowing me the first kiss?
Then turning away with blushing cheeks?
How could I have fallen into a love like this?
Even when you’re silent, your heart speaks.

You remember the night you sang to me,
And made my heart quiver and rejoice?
The nightingale awoke, and perched silently,
Just gazing and listening to your sweet voice.

You remember when you playfully tickled me,
And smothered me in your warm embrace?
Your appeared all aglow, shining so brightly,
And all I could do is stare at your face.

Do you ever think on that cloudy and dreadful day,
When the rains fell and you left me standing there?
I stood in tears and watched you walk away,
You never even looked back for one final stare.

You kept on walking and I just stood there,
And was too tongue tied to voice my dissent.
I only watched the wind playing in your hair,
And prayed it would deliver to me one final scent.

This heart is all damped in sadness, but it copes;
It once bloomed like a garden tended by you.
It’s withered now, like a grave of buried hopes;
No light, no birdsongs, no scents, no hue.

©Habib Dabajeh

CLOUDS

The sun is out, I think it’s day.
How bright it shines, I cannot say.
To look out the window, I do not dare;
I know dark clouds are looming there.

A silent tear as I painfully recall
All the smiles that light this wall.
Those endless smiles of youth and grace,
But now only frowns scar this face.

The birds call out, I know they’re near,
Singing those songs I long to hear.
I crack my window and heard one bird say,
“Be silent now, maybe he’ll go away!”

And now my eyes were flushed red;
More burning tears fell as my heart bled.
How bleak it is now to look upon a tree,
And find no song there waiting for me.

The night falls, and in darkness, I lay;
If the stars are countless, I cannot say.
Hidden behind clouds, they must be few.
If the moon is out, it’s hiding, too.

I gaze at my shelf for a random book,
And light a candle to have a look.
I turned to Longfellow’s “Rainy Day,”
And the grey-haired one began to say:

“Be still, sad heart, and cease repining;
Behind the clouds is the sun still shining.
Thy Fate is the common Fate of all;
Into each life, some rain must fall…..”

I put down the book, and decide to pray.
Will the clouds ever clear, I cannot say.

DARKENED SKY

Upon a cold and eerie night, I flew-
On the wings of empty dreams.
My heart was pounding as my curiosity grew,
To the uncanny scenes and distant screams.

Black crows filled the darkened sky,
And sang with a sad and dreadful shrill.
I had no voice, only a distraught sigh,
And wondered if life was mine still.

No hope can mend the heart that grieves,
No prayers can light the darkened sky.
Upon a tomb are scattered the leaves,
Where friends gather to wail and cry.

VACATED HEART

The sun has grown cold and dark,
Its light and warmth have degraded.
The moon and stars have extinguished,
Blackest of the night; all beauty has faded.

The poems in every heart have died.
The seas are now deserts, barren and deep.
The birds grow silent, with no will left to sing,
They perch on leafless boughs and weep.

And I’m also in tears, and thinking of you still.
Have you never suffered the slightest misgiving?
Echoes of your love now pervade my heart;
I’m still breathing, but I am not living.

I sit here alone, and my mind is in pieces.
I think of your last smile, and the tears start
To induce my burning pain and sadness.
Your love has vacated my heart.

WHAT IS DESPAIR

I often ask, what is true despair?
Is it a bird with a broken wing;
That gazes sadly from a bough,
As other birds flutter and sing?

Oppressed and alone am I,
Like that dead tree in a shroud of gloom,
That dies weeping for her fallen leaves,
There in the midst of a meadow in full bloom.

I too have seared in my days,
Like that moth that waits patiently all day,
Then coaxed to the candle unwillingly by night,
Only to burn cruelly, and then wither away.

I wonder and ponder to no avail,
Like a lone rain cloud searching in vain
For that one drop that fell to the sea;
Believing that same drop will return again.

Unseen beauty have I been denied,
Much like a blind man trying to forget
The sighs and gasps coming from a crowd
That have gathered to watch the sunset.

Oh, there was a time not long ago
I used to raise my head to the Friend.
I would plead in vain with hands raised high,
But all I heard was laughter in the wind.

Now I’m torn and must concede:
That despair is trying in vain to cope
With the sudden death inside the heart;
When that which died inside is hope.

©Habib Dabajeh

BYGONE YEARS

As dark clouds begin to unfold,
An annoying crow shrieks from afar,
And I’m more chided than flattered.
The wind picks up, and it’s blowing cold,
And the leaves are wet and scattered.
In the midst of the uncanny and bizarre,
That once courageous boy is not so bold.
As I stand there in silence and look around-
Things tend not to be what they seem.
No more light or beauty, no soothing sound;
No voice to guide me, or warm hand to hold;
Youth was like a dream.

©Habib Dabajeh

HOPELESS

When life gets mellow, a tear will start
To bring to light a sweet memory.
We sit and ponder with a bleeding heart,
But time will not rescind Fate’s decree.

We neglected them alive, now mourn them dead.
We wail and weep on hands and knees.
We deferred saying what needed to be said,
As time mocks the heart, and hope flees.